- Home
- Anderson, Abigail
The things we do for love. Page 4
The things we do for love. Read online
Page 4
She knew who that chest belonged to. She did not need to look up. She could smell his scent, it enveloped her. She could feel the hum in her body as it reacted to Luke’s. Damn he was close. She could feel the contours of his chest, his stomach. His… A small whimper escaped from her throat as the heat rose in her cheeks.
“Sorry.” She mumbled into his chest. Though why she was sorry she had no idea.
“For what.” Luke’s husky voice rasped across her eardrums and made her shiver against him. His arm tightened further in response and he took in a deep slow breath.
He really should stop breathing. It was doing funny things to her insides.
“I…” she stopped, her brain refusing to work. That seemed to happen a lot when he was around her.
“You know she ran off without a backward glance.” He told her.
“She’s tired.” She excused.
“Tired? Yes, because she is the only one that has to deal with that.” She heard the mocking tone but chose to ignore it.
“I don’t want to argue.” She told his suit jacket.
“Good, because that is the last thing on my mind right now too.” He agreed, something in his voice sent a shiver down her spine.
“I…” her mouth had gone dry and her body was shaking against him. This so wasn’t fair.
“She didn’t even wait to see whether she had managed to kill you.” She heard the thread of anger. But she also knew that it wasn’t directed at her.
“She didn’t mean it.” She instantly jumped to her sister’s defence.
“Really?” Luke asked. She almost looked up at him then but she worked hard to keep looking at the top pocket of his charcoal suit jacket. “How easily you jump to the defence of such a worthless sister.” He scorned her.
“She doesn’t mean to do the things she does.”
“She can’t help it.” Luke agreed with her.
“Yes.”
“Cassie.” It was barely audible even this close. His voice dropping to a seductive tone. His voice pleading and she knew instinctively that he wanted her to look up at him. She kept her eyes firmly planted on that top pocket.
“Please.” She begged as she tried to swallow.
“Please… what Cassie.” A high pitched noise escaped from her and she could feel that familiar throbbing start up. The one that she had felt several times over the last couple of weeks.
She wanted him, she needed him. But that was never going to happen. She had Faye.
“I…” she said on a breathy note.
“She manipulates you Cassie. I have watched her. I have heard her. I have seen her.”
“It’s not like that.”
“She knows that she does it. She enjoys doing that.” He continued, getting his point across.
“It’s not like that, really. She just… doesn’t understand.” She tried to deny, but she knew better. It was like that. Faye did manipulate her and it was deliberate and well thought out.
“I am not going to let you keep lying to yourself Cassie.” He promised her and she looked up into his eyes then. Big mistake, she knew, the minute her heart stopped and lurched in her chest whilst something lower down clenched tight.
Luke dropped his head closer to her and for one giddy filled moment she actually thought that he was going to kiss her.
But he stopped and hovered close to her. Her lips parted and She watched Luke’s eyes drop to it as his eyes darkened.
Cassie held her breath as her heart began thudding painfully in her chest. “I promise you that.” He said and then he let go of her and stepped away from her.
She turned, she needed to get away from him now. She ran down the stairs like a bat out of hell and across the foyer before tumbling out the door without looking back.
Once outside she took several deep calming breaths before she made her way to the car park.
She found her sister leaning up against the passenger door. Her arms crossed over and her head to one side like she was a stroppy teenager again.
“Where the hell have you been.” She demanded as Cassie drew close. “Making nice with him again. Wow, you’re such a whore.” Faye threw at her and Cassie thinned her lips and clenched her fists.
“Get in the car.” She told her as she pressed the button to unlock the car and reached for the handle on the driver’s door.
“Whatever he told you, he’s a bloody liar.” Faye huffed like a child and opened the car door and got in, pressing the button to open the window. It was summer and quite hot today.
Cassie eased herself behind the wheel of the car and sat back in the chair.
“Why Faye? Why?” Cassie was tired. No, she corrected she was beyond tired.
“It wasn’t my fault.” Faye told her.
“It is your fault and he is right. I enable you.” Cassie admitted on a deep sigh. “I want to make an appointment for you to see the doctor.” She said.
“What.” Faye exploded. “You are going to listen to that, that… idiot. That jackass.”
“Faye. Please.”
“You see why I have to keep you away from men. You fall for them all the time and you let them tell you that you should send me away.”
“Faye.”
“You should be thanking me that I run them off.”
“I need you to get help Faye.” She tried again. She really was sick of this argument.
“You are a traitor. You promised. You promised mum that you would look after me.”
“And I am trying but you don’t make it easy Faye.”
“On her death bed too. Shame on you.”
“It’s not like that.”
“I hate you. Do you hear me.” Faye brought up her hand and Cassie knew what was coming.
She turned in her seat, bringing up an arm to protect her head and hunch over her back as Faye rained down with her hand, blow after blow in a furious fit of rage. It lasted a good minute and then, when finally, the blows stopped, Cassie straightened in her seat.
“Feel better?” she asked her sister.
“Oh Cassie. You make me so mad at times.” Faye started. “I wish you wouldn’t. I really don’t want to hurt you but you just… you know how to push my buttons.” Faye sighed.
“I am sorry.” Cassie said.
“You’re my sister, I forgive you. But you have to stop saying things I don’t like Cassie. I mean I only ever lash out at you when you won’t stop. You know that, right?” Faye asked in a small voice.
“Yes I know. I am sorry.” Cassie told her. “But, you need help. I cannot cope anymore. I just can’t.”
“Oh please don’t send me away. Please.” Faye instantly begged her.
“This isn’t about sending you away. I can’t cope anymore Faye.”
“Don’t abandon me.” She begged again.
“I am not abandoning you.”
“We both know what happens to people in those kinds of places. Cassie please. You still love me right?” Faye’s voice became cajoling, childlike.
“Of course I do.”
“Please tell me you still love me. You’re not going to leave me right?” Faye continued in her tiny baby voice. She had perfected that one over the years.
“No, no of course not Faye.” Faye threw her arms about her sister and Cassie hugged her. “It’s okay Faye. Let’s go home and just forget about all this okay.”
“Okay.” Faye hiccupped. “Do you promise you still love me.” She asked her and Cassie heard the uncertainty in her voice and the emotion.
“Of course I still love you.” She reassured.
“Then we’ll just forget about it.” And then Faye sat back up as though nothing had just happened without so much as a tear in her eye.
She put on her seatbelt and then turned to her sister before saying. “Well?” And she raised her eyebrows at her before getting comfortable.
Cassie thinned her lips to stop herself saying something not very nice, reached for her seat belt and turned the key in the ignition. As she did so
she looked up to see Luke. Standing at his car. Hand on the driver’s opened door staring right at her.
Great! She wondered how long he had been standing there watching. From the look on his face he had been there a while. Had he seen Faye’s Violent outburst. He looked angry, very angry, so that was going to be a yes.
Cassie turned her eyes away from him and steered the car out of the car park as her heart broke inside. Damn Faye and her inappropriate behaviour, again …
Chapter 6.
When Cassie returned to the house she closed the front door and leant up against it for several long minutes while she sorted through her jumbled thoughts and slowed down her heart beat.
When she felt as though she had achieved some kind of calm, okay so she lied to herself, she then made her way into the kitchen.
She found Faye waiting nervously in the kitchen. She paced up and down like a caged tiger and rung her hands together. when Cassie walked into the room Faye turned towards her, turning sharply on her heel.
Cassie could see the terror in her eyes and she wished that she could placate, Did she? No not really. She knew the time was over for that. Cassie had to take control of this situation once and for all.
How are you going to do that? A little voice in her head asked her. She had no idea. She had tried everything she could think of. Ever since their teenage years she had tried and nothing had worked.
Cassie was tired of it all. No, she corrected, she was more than tired. She really did not think that there was any more that she could take. She was at breaking point and she knew it.
“I am so sorry sis.” Faye began as soon as Cassie was inside the room.
“I need a minute.” She informed her sister quietly and Faye dutifully fell silent.
Cassie sighed and rubbed her hands over her face. Covering her features for a moment whilst she steered herself up for the conversation with her sister that lay ahead of her.
“If you will just let me explain.” Faye tried again but Cassie held a hand up to silence her.
They stared at one another for a long time. Faye looking chastened, a look of fear on her face. And Cassie looking angry, tired and fed up.
“He is right.”
“Of course he is.” Faye scorned her. “You are gonna take his side aren’t you?” she was accused.
“What do you mean by that?” Cassie frowned.
“I’m just saying, every time you look at him you look as though your knickers are getting into a right twist.” Cassie felt her cheeks grow warm. She wasn’t prepared to have this conversation so she steered it back.
“He is right.” She reiterated. “You do need a kick up the backside.” she told her sister angrily.
“If you will just let me explain.
“...Or maybe, what you need is therapy.” Cassie knew that she did.
“No please.” Faye panicked. “I will stop. I promise.”
“Until the next time. Faye we need to do something. I cannot keep doing this.”
“I know.” Faye tried to defend herself.
“Why? Why would you do that?” she sighed heavily.
“Sis, please...” Faye began desperately.
“Sis please...” Cassie echoed. “Please what?” her voice rose.
“If you just hear my side.” Cassie laughed.
“Hear your side. And then what. Please forgive me sis. Let me get away with it all again. If you’ll just let me explain myself. I didn’t mean to do it.” She mimicked her sister’s forlorn childlike voice. The one she always put on when she was trying to wheedle her way out of something.
In the past it had worked on Cassie. After the court case it had worked. But now, now she was too tired and too worn out for that.
“I am your sister.” Faye bolstered.
“Lucky me.” Cassie told her sarcastically.
“I have never been as strong as you.” She reminded her. Oh here it came, Cassie thought, how she loved this one. Faye loved to remind her of that one. Threw it in her face every time she got the chance.
“That’s not an excuse.”
“But it’s true. I have always been more delicate. You have always been able to handle everything. Sis, please.” She begged her.
“Do you know how much pain and suffering you cause people when you act that way? How much I suffer when you act that way?” Cassie asked her.
“I know but...” Faye tried but Cassie waved her hands to silence her sister who obligingly fell silent.
“No you don’t. do you?”
“But I do. I promise.” She wailed.
“No, you say you do, but I think that’s only because you think that is what is expected of you. Not that you actually feel it.” She told her sister bitterly.
That was the truth. Cassie knew, Faye seemed to lack compassion for anyone but herself. She seemed unable to show empathy for others. Cassie had always noticed that. She may not have understood when they had been younger but now as adults she knew. She could see.
Faye never cried when watching slushy sad films. She had not even cried at their mother’s funeral or in the hospital. Her face had remained unchanged, impassive. She had just got on with all her normal everyday things without any real regard.
“Cass if you will just let me tell you. Let me explain. You will see why this isn’t my fault.” Cassie shook her head sadly. Here it comes, this was all his fault. He asked for it. If he hadn’t done this or done that.
“Why is it you think you have a right to behave in such a fashion?”
“Cassie. Please...” Faye tried again but Cassie wasn’t in the mood for excuses.
“Why?” Cassie sighed and waved her hand through the air and in the direction of the front door. “Why would you do that to his car? What on earth possessed you?”
“If you’d let me explain...” Faye began.
“How in the world can you explain that?” Cassie asked her.
“If he hadn’t…”
“Don’t you dare.” Cassie shouted harshly and Faye jumped. Her eyes wide with shock. Cassie had never shouted at her like that before. And, normally she would not have done so.
But Cassie had had enough. She had reached the end of her tether. It all had to stop, it just had to. Though, that wasn’t the only reason, and Cassie knew it. Chances were that this pattern of behaviour would have continued if it hadn’t been for one thing.
Or one person. Luke Pearson.
The moment she had seen him. She had known, nothing would be the same. But Faye’s behaviour had meant that there was no chance. Cassie was hurt, not just because of Faye.
She was hurt because she had allowed herself to develop feelings for the man. Strong sexual feelings for a man that she would never be able to have because Faye was… well, Faye. Talk about injustice. “Don’t you even think about saying that this was somehow his fault. That he deserved it.”
“Well he did.” Faye moaned childishly.
“How?”
“He got me fired. He took me to court.” Faye pointed out.
“He was in his rights to take you to court and you got yourself fired for behaving inappropriately.” Cassie told her. Hadn’t they already had this particular argument?
“He told you that I was mentally unstable. That I was a psychotic, neurotic demented woman that needed locking up for a very long time.” Yes, he had said that and although Cassie had defended Faye, she actually had agreed with him secretly deep down.
“You wrote such vile stuff all over the man’s car. He didn’t deserve that. What made you think that that was acceptable behaviour? What was going on in that head of yours?” Cassie pulled out a chair from the table. “Is there anything going on in that head of yours?”
“Craig and...”
“Craig and Olivia...” Cassie repeated sceptically. “Oh no you don’t.” She told her sister.
“What?”
“Aren’t you a little too old to pull that one.” She scolded. “Perhaps you should stay away from them if they are that mu
ch of a bad influence.”
“I don’t believe this. I never thought I would see the day. Wow, you must think he’s really good.” Faye threw scornfully at her.
“What are you on about?”
“You, siding with him.” Faye said. “That man. Huh. With his eyes and his muscles and his… his… whatever else he’s got.” Faye finished bitterly.
“I am not. I just need you to understand that your behaviour is wrong.” Cassie tried again.
“You are. You are taking his side aren’t you. What about me?” Faye demanded hotly.
“I am not siding with anyone.”
“Yes you are. You back stabber.” Faye flung at her angrily.
“Do you not understand the way you behave?”
“It’s not my fault.” Faye told her sister.
“Yes it is.”
“No it’s not. He started it with his… his…” she stopped and huffed.
“You came on to the guy and he turned you down.” Cassie reminded her. That’s what this had all been about. Faye had been put out when he had told her firmly that there was no way he found her appealing in any way shape or form. Faye had seen red which had led to the rug incident and from there it had all been downhill very fast.
“He told me if I was the last woman on earth he wouldn’t touch me with a barge pole.”
“He’s entitled to his opinion.” Cassie pointed out. “And you had made his evening hell. Kept on for hours before he finally snapped.”
“The man doesn’t know what he is missing.” Faye told her.
“I think he probably does.” Cassie remarked.
“Why are you on his side? If he wouldn’t sleep with me then he’s not going to sleep with you.” Faye told her scathingly.
“Faye, you behave badly. He is right, you need help. Professional help. This isn’t about taking anyone’s side. You acted inappropriately.” Cassie stood firm on her point.
She knew why Faye was throwing accusations at her. She was hoping to divert her attention so that they were no longer arguing about this.